


You can only forgive yourself, and let our hearts become one.

by Park_Jisu



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-28
Updated: 2016-02-22
Packaged: 2018-05-03 01:55:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,394
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5272220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Park_Jisu/pseuds/Park_Jisu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What would happens when you give into desires and wants? Would it be worth it or would it hurt the other person. Would you give up your life to make sure your mate was fine and nothing never happen to him or her? Would you lay down your life for your unborn child? Well would you? These are the thoughts that ran through Kaneki Ken's mind when he is corner by the CCG shinigami.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Mates

"K-Ka..neki ahhh"

Hide's moans as Kaneki suck and nibble at his neck while his hands work their magic on his body. It would seem that this wasn't the first time they were intimate with each other but that wasn't case. In fact it was the first time but as Kaneki skillful ran his hands around Hide's body it would leave anyone doubtful. Working his way to his towards his partner nipples, he proceeded to tweaking and pinching them earning him another set of moans. Moving away from Hide's neck he look down at his lover seeing his face red and his eyes half-lidded close but fill with lust made him incredibly hard. Kaneki brought his two fingers towards Hide's mouth he and said in a deep smooth velvet voice.

"Suck."

Obeying him Hide open his mouth and coated the fingers with his saliva. Deeming that the fingers felt to be thoroughly soak he took the fingers out of his partner mouth and lower his face towards Hide and kissed him roughly. Distracted he didn't realize that Kaneki position he finger at his entrance, it was when he felt an intrusion that swiftly followed by pain that he cry out and gasp. His back arch as he lean into Kaneki as he move at the discomfort he felt from the first finger, chest to chest. Gripping and starching at Kaneki's back, he knew this wasn't the real thing but it hurt without a doubt, but oddly enough after the pain dull down it didn't hurt no more just pleasure as Kaneki move his finger out of him at a steady pace. 

Kaneki P.O.V

Watching Hide come undone as I finger him set something in me. My pants became unbearable tight and I felt constricted, but I had to be careful. Hide's body is way too frail for me to be rough so he wouldn't be able to do what he wanted with him, in fact I knew that if I lost just a single ounce of control than I will end up hurting him or breaking him. But as I struggle to control myself, my efforts were rendered completely useless as I gaze upon my lover and his expression that show pure pleasure, and if that wasn't enough my lover breath out in a small and panting voice.

"Kaneki..please make love to..me. Please I want you."

With that being said any self control I thought I had completely snap, pulling out my finger quickly that earn a whine that left his blonde lover's lips, he unbuckle his pants and struggle them off. Kicking the pants off it landed on the floor besides the bed that they were on along with my boxers. Positioning myself at Hide's entrance I shove myself into Hide pucker hole roughly before going completely and utterly still as his love cries of pain reaches my ears and snapping me back into reality. Eyes wide I kept completely still as regret, guilt and despair fill his eyes when he realize what's he did. I was trying to restrain himself from hurting my love yet I did just that, I'd manage to still hurt him and it greatly pained me, my muscles flex and clench together tightly as I held myself on my elbows refusing to put his weight on his partner. As blood trickle down Hide's legs as he cry for a full eight minutes and during that time not once has Kaneki move. After the pain die down a bit he experimentally roll his hips after he cross his legs around Kaneki waist, wincing a bit he waited another two minutes before leaning up towards Kaneki's ear and saying " It's okay to move Kaneki. I'm fine really." Giving another roll of his hips he bit back a cry of pain, grimacing to himself he deducted that Kaneki may have not prepare him well enough plus with the strength of his ghoul side he wasn't yet completely ready to go. Seeing Hide reaction steeled my resolves more, to not more and keep still while Hide adjust to his size, Kaneki himself knows that he is big like really big, being ten and a half inches when he was fully erected. Adding to the fact that this was Hide first time he felt another shoot of guilt as he made his first experience very painful. After another two minutes of waiting for all the pain to reside, Hide once again decided to move his hips and was relief when he felt just a dull pain that came with pleasure. Nodding his head he motion towards Kaneki to move, yet he didn't move even with the signal still afraid that he may end up hurting Hide. Sighing to himself the blonde tighten his arms around the ghoul and pull him closer towards his body and move his hips yet again to show that he was now fine and it was okay to just move, to prove that he was fine and they can continue. Moving out until only the tip was still inside he paused for a second before slamming back in and proceed to set a slow punishing pace that drove Hide insane. Whining at the slow pace Hide began to beg and move his hips faster, telling Kaneki to move faster. Hearing his lover's pleas to go faster he comply it wasn't before long his thrust became hard, frantic and rough. His restrains breaking as the time went on, he was no longer holding back or paying attention to anything but the pleasure. That was his biggest mistake.

I didn't notice that Hide went quiet.  
I didn't notice that Hide went still.  
And I certainly didn't notice that more blood was trickling down Hide legs.  
I didn't notice the bruises that were slowly developing on Hide’s ass and legs.

“Ahhh Hide, I'm cumming!”

But when I did notice it all I could do was only stare in horror when I was done with my orgasm at the damage I've cause. Slowly and as gently as possible I pull out of the blond, taking great caution into not hurting him anymore. Bring both my hands to my head I curse as I then ran my hands through my pure white hair before quickly looking around to find my discarded clothes and put them on. With that done I than went to the bathroom and started the bath, having the water warm. Coming out the bathroom I carefully and gently pick up Hide and brought him to the bathroom and slowly and as carefully as possible put him in the tub. Keeping a close on eye him to make sure he didn't drown while he went to grab a washcloth that was hanging on a rack beside him along with the soap and gently began cleaning Hide’s body. Once all of the cum was off and making sure that his insides were clean, I then proceeded to drain the tub and struggle of his clothes and turned on the shower and pick Hide body up. I let the water rinse both our body, I knew that I had to get my boyfriend to a hospital to treat all of his wounds but I didn't trust doctors however I knew that not all doctors were like Kanou. Tighten my grip a little on Hide’s frail body, I just didn't want to take that chance. Sighing to myself, I then decided to call Nishio, as much as Nishio claim to not like Hide, I knew better. That the older man in fact somewhat care for Hide, that he consider him his friend. He knew that when Nishio beat up Hide, he could have immediately killed him but he didn't he waited for me to get serious, so he could prove that I was serious about saving him. Hide and Nishio got along very well so when he attack Hide when he was there he knew something was up, he just found out much later. Deciding that the older man was the best choice for the situation I carefully step out of the shower and release three of my kagune. One to turn of the shower and the other two to grab towels for Hide and myself. Wrapping a towel around my waist while the other went around Hide which was very large as it wrap around hide’s whole body from the shoulders to his ankles and around his body. Make sure that both towels were secure around both of them, I headed back into Hide’s room and began drying off hide then next. With that done I then put the blond on the edge of the bed away from their ‘mess’ and where it was at least clean. Looking around I pick up any discarded clothes that were on the floor and put them in the hamper, next he went to the dresser and pull out some clothes for Hide. Dressing him, Kaneki then went to another draw a pull out some spare clothes that I always kept over at Hide’s house. Getting dressed I went over to the nightstand that is located on the right side of the bed by the window and pick up my phone to contact Nishio. While waiting for him to pick, I walk over to Hide and gently began to my his right hand through Hide’s hair while my other hand held the phone to my ear listening to the dial it wasn't long before I've heard someone pick up that grunted in my ear.

“What do you want Kaneki?”

“I need a favor, I needed you to check up on Hide for me. I'm no doctor and he unconscious.”

“What did that idiot do now that could have reduced him to fainting?”

“Actually it was my fault that he's unconscious no-”

Cutting him of Nishio growled out “ What do you mean it's your fault! Kaneki you have ten second to explain now!”

"I went too far when we were having sex and I kinda….lost control….I didn't notice that he went unconscious or that h-he…was bleeding.”

“....Are you guys at your place or his?

“We're at his.”

“.........I’ll be right over, and Kaneki.”

“....Yeah?”

"Was this Hide first time? And did you guys even have lube?”

“It was Hide first time and no we didn't have lube.”

“Shit.”

“What?”

"Give me fifteenth to twenty minutes and Kaneki whatever you do don't touch Hide. Until then I'll see you in a few. You better be prepare to face Manager and the other once they hear about this”

“Wait Ni-”

The line went dead as Nishio ended the call.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story doesn't follow the canon and its completely separate. However there will be some situation that will be similar.
> 
> I've taken it upon myself to edit this chapter since I've been told that I was switching back from first person to third person a lot and sorry for that since I'm not entirely use to doing first point of view. I thought I would like to give it a try, so thank you for being patient with me.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nishiki arrives to the scene and later Kaneki receives some shocking news.

He should have known this would happen. He should've known that he shouldn't have touched his boyfriend or even give into his desire to ravage him. To have him scream his name repeatedly like a broken mantra. He knew that Hide is smaller than him, weaker, and a lot more fragile than he’ll ever be. Hell he could practically pin down Hide with one hand and in his kakuja mode with one finger.

He just had to give into his ghoul side, damn it all to hell and back. With him being a half-ghoul he was natural stronger than his lover, who's a human. If he knew of the damage he would do beforehand he would have gladly allow Jason to torture him again for another ten days, just anything but this. However he knew that Hide would never allow it or even have him consider the possibility of that happen, to have him torture so he wouldn't be hurt. He love him way too much that he would allow Kaneki to do whatever he wanted with his body no questions ask. When Kaneki went missing and made his own group after the whole Jason fanasico, Hide wasn't properly taking care of himself. Allowing himself to become almost anorexic. He was so thin and skinny that when Touka and Nishio saw him they had immediately contacted Kaneki and inform him of Hide condition out of concern. The ghouls at Anteiku who have seen and heard of the human that Kaneki hang around with became worry when they had of his state and made it their duty to protect and look out for him, during this time that gotten to know and actually care about him not because he was Kaneki’s lover or most important person but for himself and who he was as a person. They found out he was both a beautiful person inside and out with an amazing personality. They also found out that he knew what they are, but that didn’t change his view on them as they were still them and that he accept both them and Kaneki. The ghouls of Anteiku came to genuinely love and care for Hide and would gladly die to protect him.

That had been months ago, maybe at least three or four months to be precise. When Kaneki was inform of the situation and saw the state that Hide was in he flew into pure rage at the fact that he wasn’t taking care of himself. Now after all those months Hide is still skinny, there were times were Kaneki was scared that he’ll accidentally kill him. It drove him nuts that even after all this time he was still skin and bones. Kaneki literally have to threaten his love to eat as Hide appetite diminish after his departure, right now he can only eat maybe one fourth of his food before he becomes full. This worry both him and all the ghouls of Anteiku as they all grew anxious about his condition.

Now if they meaning all of Anteiku was, no scratch that were to hear of this Kaneki would literally be a corpse in the next few hours to come. They were more protective of Hide than they were of Kaneki. Especially Hinami, Roma, Nishio, Touka and the manager. They all saw him as an older brother, little brother and son. They could never find another him in this world and for that reason for not only accepting them, they cherish him in return. 

Thinking about how he was going to explain to them what he did, he slowly began to inwardly get depressed as he picture having to face the disappointment in each and every face he was going to see later on today, if he didn't tell them, then Nishio surely will. And if Nishio tell them he going to tell them the extended of all the damage he did while he would just leave that part out. This turned out to be a suckish day indeed. Hopefully when they're done torturing and beating him they'll kill him and give him a respectable funeral. Well if there was anything left of him after they were through with him that is.

Sighing to himself Kaneki allow himself to drop to the floor sitting cross legged and hold his face with both his hand. While he was just getting comfortable in this new sitting position, he heard the doorbell and immediately sprang up on his feet and walk towards the door with knowledge that it was Nishio. Preparing himself to face off his very piss off sempai, he took a deep breath and close his eyes for a second before reopening them. Grabbing the door he open the door to have himself punch immediately as soon as the door was fully open, not bothering to dodge it he allow himself to accept it as he knew that what Nishio was doing wouldn't be worse than what Touka would do when she found out. Compare to everyone else the one who got the closest to Hide personally expect for Kaneki was Touka and Hinami as both girl saw him as their older brother. He slowly broke down their walls and got them to realize that not all humans were bad and that there is always someone who would expect you no matter how different you may be. 

As soon as the punch connect another one soon follow before another and another. It wasn't long till Nishio was breathing heavily and slumped against the wall with Kaneki calmly standing there, he was use to pain so it didn't bother him nor did it affect him in anyway. In fact he barely felt it not to say that Nishio is by any means weak it just that he simply got too strong. Strong to the point that nothing ever faze him no more well expect for something happening to Hide. If it wasn't that than nothing ever but him on edge, he never care about what could happen to himself but he'll be damn if something happens to Hide.

Allowing his friend to regain his breath for a few seconds and urging him to follow him into the apartment and to Hide's room where his unconscious boyfriend reside. Glancing behind him he took in his sempai reaction to seeing the unconscious boy, and so far his reaction was that of a furious panther with his eyes narrow and an angry scrowl making its way onto his face. His glasses glinting dangerous as well as a terrifying dark aura envelope around him seem so much more terrifying than usual. 

Whipping around he stalks towards Kaneki his steps soundless but with each step if it wasn't anyone other than Kaneki they would have broken down at just how close he was getting and the furious expression he wore. Nishio was the perfect example of a predator and he knew just how intimidating he is. With lightning fast reflexes he grabs Kaneki by the front of his shirt and yank him forward to him and practically growl in his face.

“WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO! THIS LOOKS LIKE A FUCKING RAPE SCENE! WAS THIS SHIT EVEN CONSENSUALLY? THERE TOO MUCH BLOOD AND HE LOOK LIKE YOU WAS BEATING HIM UNTIL HE LOSE UNCONSCIOUSNESS! ”

Not answering he allow his friend to yell at him not defending himself as he practically call him a rapist. Accusing him of even thinking of violating Hide, or even the notion of hurting him. He did nothing and said nothing as Nishio mantle handle him and scream at him. He deserve it, he was sure of that. He should have paid more attention to what he was doing and not let himself get carry away yet he did and now look at the consequences. He only had himself and only himself to blame.

Shaking Kaneki a little he ask in a more calmer and more compose voice than before.

“I thought I told you not to touch him. It smells like he took a shower but he still smells like sex despite the soap and water that you use on him.”

“I clean him up before I even call you.” He finally answer, his voice dull and lifeless.

“...........Was it worse than this? I mean was the aftermath of your ‘activity’ was it worse than the state he in now?” 

“...There was more blood all over him. Gomen Nishio sempai.”

“I'm not the one you should be saying that too.”

Dropping his head and sighing yet again to himself for at least the fourth or fifth time for today he said in a defeated tone. “...Your right.”

“When he wakes up, you better make it up to him, for not only making his first time horrible and making him a bloody mess but also for rendering him unconscious and broken. Seriously Kaneki don't you have no control?” 

Walking over to where Hide was Nishio began to inspect him. Pulling off his newly fresh white shirt and dark blue shorts he began to look and gently poke each and every wound. Glancing down at his right side he open up his emergency kit that for the first time Kaneki notice that he had with him this entire time. And began to pull out all kinds of stuff from gauze to alcohol to pain killers and much more. Once all of the stuff he deem necessary was out he began to work and occasionally ask Kaneki to help him with simple task like getting a bowl of water for cleaning Hide's wounds or a glass of water for when Hide woke up so he can take his pills and have something to help it done. After an hour he was done, but as he was finishing up he stop and smelt the air, freezing he carefully finish up his wrapping and lean closer to Hide and started to sniff him. With his eyes wide as the scent register what exactly he smelled like he whip around to where Kaneki was and with all his strength punch him straight in the face. Breathing heavily, curses after curses flowing out his mouth as he watch Kaneki remain unaffected even though a punch like that would normally knock even a regular ghoul out cold. 

“Why did you punch me this time? I thought you was done after all the punches you gave me earlier, Nishio.”

Snarling and narrowing his eyes Nishio reply back with him saying to smell Hide.

Drawing his eyebrows together as confusion wash over his face, Kaneki walks towards Hide and sniff him a bit. Still looking confuse he looks towards Nishiki but he only urge him to take another wiff. This time he breath in deeping allow Hide’s scent to fill his nostrils and as the scent register in his head he notice something was off with it, Hide normally smelt like sunflowers and a fresh summer breeze. But as he took in the scent of his boyfriend now he still smelt the small with just an exact addition to it. It smelt like another scent of another person! His eyes wide he glance towards Nishio, who had a grim look on his face as the both knew with this meant for the blonde. 

“Nishio, it can't be possible that he's….”

“Ah it's true.”

“But where both guys this doesn't make any sense.”

“All ghouls have this ability, they can do it to just about anyone.”

“No way…”

“He smell just like any other woman I've had the chance of meeting during their time of pregnancy. Beside it can't be anybody else since you're always with him or he at Anteiku. And never once have me or any other ghoul that's knows him have smelt another smelt on him from a different ghoul. And that new smell, ‘It’ smells like a mixture of both him and you. Besides you have to take into account that it was his first time so there no possible way that he had any sexual intercourse with anyone else.”

“This can’t be happening.”

“Oh but it is, Blondie here smells as if he has another scent coming off of him and that could mean one things, he's somehow managed to get pregnant as it's possible for a ghoul of any gender to impregnate anyone regardless if you may or may not be the opposite gender. However it's very rarely that it happens. Luck you, that you got Nagachika here knock up on the very first try even if it wasn't intentional.” His voice ended with a sarcastic note to it.

Gripping Kaneki’s left should he also added this time in a serious voice that held all joke aside. “It's better if you just give yourself time to take this in. Whatever you decide to do is up to you, however say by any chance you don't want the kid and want to aborted it and Hide wants to keep it, which I know he will. Than your going to have to fight Hide tooth and nails, since he doesn't believe in that stuff. Hell he might even leave just to have the kid. So think about this carefully, he loves you but if it means giving up on a life that's not only his own flesh and blood than your in for a rude awaken if you think he's gonna abort it just to keep you happy. Just really think about this Kaneki.”

And with that he gently push him out the room so that the frail blonde lying down in bed doesn't wake up, as he needed all the sleep he can get. It surprise them both that he was still asleep even with Nishio outburst from earlier but as they listen closely they could both tell that Hide was really unconscious. Looking back towards the small blonde Nishio shoot him a sympathetic look before quietly and gently closing the door behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again this is a different timeline with similar events and not entirely following the canon.


	3. Telling Everyone else

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nishiki convince Kaneki tell Anteiku

A loud sigh was heard in the living room of the two bedroom apartment, two men were in there currently, one of them was on couch who look to be in deep thought with white hair and the other one who had dirty blonde hair, he was leaning against the wall for a few seconds before pushing himself off and slowly and calmly walking towards the guy on the couch. Another sigh was heard as the blonde ran his right hand through his hair and groaning in frustration as he made his way towards his companion as slowly as he can. Nishiki became a lot calmer and less aggravated than he was awhile ago as he allow himself to accept what happen. Nothing wasn’t going to change no matter how much both of them wish for it. That wasn’t how the world work and for that they had to deal with it, no matter how much they didn’t want to. Cracking his neck Nishio began to slowly roll his shoulders a bit. As he finally work out the kinks, he try to gather his thoughts on how he was going to talk to the others about this if Kaneki himself didn’t attempt to, which he knew that he wouldn’t unless pressure too. For the third time he allow a sigh to pass through his lips and felt as if he was stalling, in fact he was stalling he knew that the moment he ended up talking to Kaneki or call Touka and the others about the situation he’ll be having to deal with enraged ghouls and desperately holding back Touka from permanently removing Kaneki from the world of the living. Finally after taking his very sweet time he reach to where Kaneki was and sat down next to him on the plush black couch, deciding that he waited long enough he said to him “You have to tell them you know? They’ll get worry once they realize that he won’t be making an appearance in a few days or so. After all you guys are always together so it would lead to suspicion if he wasn’t there for more than just a day or two. From extend of all the wounds I’ve seen on him and inspected he won’t be walking around for at least two or two and half weeks, give or take.”

Taking a deep shaky breath Kaneki let out a weak strained laugh, that was dry of all humor and sincerity at the situation that he got himself into. Not only was he trying to copy with all the guilt he was feeling inside of him but he was being ask to tell his closest friends of his failure and mistake of not being able to keep Hide safe, he suppose to be able to protect him. Even if it was from himself yet he fail so miserably. 

This time he was the one to sigh, and groan at not only the situation itself but the irony of it all. The one who protect ended up being the one to cause the damage and the pain. He was the one that was suppose to prevent it yet in the end he was the one who did it.

“I know.” And with that he stood up and went to Hide’s room and grab his phone and once again went back to the living room. Dialing Anteiku store number he waited for the manager or any of the employees to pick up the phone. 

Waiting patiently after ten seconds the phone was answer, and a familiar female voice was heard that made Kaneki pause for a split second before clearing his voice and speaking into the mouthpiece of the phone. 

“Hello Touka-Chan, I have some news that you and the other must hear about….”

“About?” 

“It's about Hide.”

“Why? What happen, is he sick or something.” The concern was clear as day, to anyone who was listen.

“I’ll tell you and the other once you guys get here. I'm at Hide's house and right now I can leave him alone in the state he's in.”

“What kind of state he is in Kaneki!” Her voice rising in volume compared to how she was talking to him before. 

“Get here in an hour with the other, than I'll tell you along with the rest.” And with that the call was over.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Anteiku~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hinami who been standing next to Touka and heard the conversation due to her sharp hearing look to her in worry. Shifting from one foot to another she bit her bottom lip before asking in a small voice “Do you think that Hide-nii is okay, nee-chan?

Smiling in an effort to calm the little girl down and ease her worry, she reply back in a soft smooth voice that instantly made Hinami relax and smiling brightly. 

“Of course he is, knowing him he probably lyrics got a surprise for everyone or something. Everything is going to be okay.”

What she didn't know was that not everything would be as fine as she said it'll be.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~An hour later~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Frantic knocking sounds were heard throughout the two bedroom apartment. Muffle voices were also heard as well as the shuffling of various feets outside the door. Walking towards the door Kaneki grasp the handle and slowly turn the knob and open the door, just as Touka raise her hand once again to knock on it. Seeing that the door was open and just who exactly open the door she attempt to smile a bit. However it didn't reach her eyes nor was it sincere, it was look as if it was entirely force. Looking behind her Kaneki saw that she indeed manage to gather Anteiku as well as Kimi. Opening the door fully he signal for all of them to come inside and head straight for the living room but as they enter it they were meet with two things. One was the scent of blood, and the second was a very grim Nishiki Nishio who was still sitting on the couch. Whipping around Touka was face to face with Kaneki once he made his way towards the front of the group after closing the front door. Hinami, who had been visibly excited to hear that she would be able to hear that she would be visit her two brother today was frozen in place once she took in the scent of blood, she automatically knew whose blood it was. All of her earlier excitement was gone and was replaced by sheer horror.

“We need to talk.”

“Kaneki what happen to Hide.” Regaining her composure immediately Touka was the first one to voice everyone's question. 

Hanging his head low so his white hair cover the very front of his face, Kaneki began to tremble and clenching and unclenching his hands repeatedly. After a few seconds of doing this, he motion towards Nishio with his head tilted towards him. Seeing this gesture Nishiki sigh once he realize that Kaneki couldn't do it and so it was up to him to tell them. Preparing himself for the headaches, screaming and attempt of murder to come he straighten up a bit. Looking at each and everyone of them directly in their faces, he knew that this wouldn't be easy but he didn't think that even he would have the heart to tell them. Sighing once more he began to explain “Kaneki lost control to his instincts. The blood your smelling wasn't due to him trying to get a bite out of Hide and succeeding, it was due the mating side that he lost control of and ended up with Kaneki acting violently towards Hide…...it later turn into rape and now Hide is unconscious with various of wounds all over his body ranging from cuts and bruises. He also has hand marks on his hips along with tearing of his insides.” Letting this information digest and process he risk a glance towards Touka and immediately wish he hadn't for he literally had seen devil himself. 

Right as he was about to look at the other Touka launch herself at Kaneki aiming a roundhouse kick to his head that connected and a swift punch to the gut which also connect, it wasn't long before Touka was just randomly hitting him and with him doing absolutely nothing to stop her. 

Glancing at the other discreetly he was meet with disappointment, rage, disbelief and multiple other emotions. But once he glance at Hinami, he got up from his seat and hug her as she had tears streaming down her face and whispering something under her breath that caught the older man attention. 

“What was that Hinami-chan?”

“It seems that we will be having another additional to the family soon.” That caught everyone attention as well, even Touka stop all of her attacks just to turn to the little girl in confusion.

“Ah so you notice it too, not really surprising since you always did have a more sensitive sense of smell compare to the rest of us here. What about you manager?"

“Yeah I've notice it once we first enter the apartment. It took me by surprise but there's no mistaking it.”

“Kaneki was suppose to tell you guys but as you can see, he couldn't do it. He's still in disbelief at the damage that he has done. But like Hinami said we will be having another additional to the family, meaning Hide is pregnant.” 

All eyes turn to Nishio and then to Kaneki in shock. Sighing to herself, Touka glance at both Kimi and Hinami and said that they would like to see their brother. Giving them a nod in approval, Kaneki lead them out of the living room and into the hallway that lead to Hide’s room. Knowing that he was still unconscious Kaneki, slowly opening the door and allow the girls inside. Seeing that the room was now a bit dark due to how late it's gotten he walk over to the nightstand before excusing himself. Once he fully close the door, he leaned against it. It was long before he heard the sound of two people sobbing. It wasn’t because of the news of them finding out that their precious brother like figure was pregnant, no these were tears of anguish and despair upon seeing the state he left his blonde left in. With all the bondages around him and all. 

Allowing his eyes to close slowly he lost himself in his thoughts and allow his mind to run wild. His life could really be call a tragedy sometimes, he was just so damn pathetic sometime. Pushing himself of the door of the room and balling his left hand into a fist he slam on the wall that was opposite to him, creating a small crater. 

He was just so pathetic, it was sickening.

“Damn it.”


	4. Stubbornness and forgiveness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hide wakes up only to be just as stubborn as a child

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This isn't going to be a very long chapter.  
> Imoto = Little sister

Standing in the hallway Kaneki lost track of time, became preoccupied with his thoughts and completely unaware of his surrounding that his senses dull enough that he didn’t hear Nishiki coming from out the living room as well as Touka who open the door to Hide room and walk out. Quietly closing the door to the blonde’s room and silently walking towards Kaneki and leaned on the wall of where his fist was still implanted in. While Nishiki stood next to him and allow him to have a few moment of silence and they were both tense and stress out with the news. Touka who hadn’t had the chance to calm down yet or didn’t have the opportunity to digest the information nor accept it like NIshio. But seeing the complete look of despair and so many other raw emotion that Kaneki was displaying made her think twice about attacking him again or raising her voice or anything. She knew just how much this must be killing him on the inside. Deciding that she needed to calm down before she talk to him about the news and state that she saw Hide in, she breathed in deeply and release. It wasn’t long before the silence was broken, the person who broke it though was someone they least expected it to be, for each and everyone of them turn towards the door that lead to Hide room and saw that it was wide open with Hide leaning heavily on the door frame smiling brightly despite the pain evidently on his face when he shifted his body a bit while Hinami stood of to the side of the door and Kimi offer a small but shaky smile, it was small and shaky because she knew that the moment that Hide got out of bed that chaos would soon follow. Not only would it cause a commotion but she’ll most likely get yelled at for not stopping him, but she knew that it was going to happen regardless either with her help or without it. Since he wanted to get out and see Kaneki and everyone else. Sighing to herself she knew that this was going to be a long night, that would most definitely end up with two things happening, one everyone would fuss over him getting back into bed that would result in a huge argument and two someone will end up dragging him either kicking, screaming, punching, scratching and biting. Praying to every god that out there that tonight wouldn’t end up in bloodshed or injuries, she watch as the scene unfold in front of her. 

“Yo Nishiki, Touka-chan, Kaneki.”

That greeting was all it took for them to snap back into reality and simultaneously all of them shouting their various of responds, that gain the attention of everyone who was in the living room.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing out of bed you idiot!” Nishio yelled.

“You dumbass you shouldn’t even be up and walking yet what do you think you’re trying to accomplish?” That was touka responds.

“Hide get back in bed now” Kaneki said his voice low and dangerous. Turning to Kaneki, Touka punch the upside of his head, then turn her attention to the people who were walking out of the living room.

“Eh but I don’t want to Kaneki. It boring plus I can’t even sleep no more with all the shouting that you guys were doing previously. Do you know how hard that was to block out and go back to sleep just to wake back up again to see that we have guest? It rude if the owner of his house doesn’t go and greet his guest you know.”

Grinning at the three dumbfounded ghouls, he whistle an upbeat tune and close his eyes, becoming completely unaware of the same three ghouls approaching him and determine to drag him back to bed.

And this is how Yomo, Roma, Yoshimaru, Irimi, and Eniji were all greeted to the site of three ghouls looking ready to pounce on the frail blonde for even thinking of removing himself from the comforts of his bed, while the two girls that were right next to him were smiling in nervousness at the entire situation. Sharing a look amongst each other they all decided to see how everything plays out before getting involved, except for Yoshimura who smile gently and step forward planning to end the distribute. 

“Now what's going on here?” he ask in a calm and polite voice.

Pointing in Hide’s direction Touka spoke in a aggregated voice. “Manager this idiot decided that it would be a smart idea to get out of bed instead of trying to sleep and regain his strength.”

“Hey I take offense to that, I’m actually very intelligent you know.”

“Well gee you have a funny way of showing it you moron, just get back in bed.”

 

“Aww but I don’t wanna~~~”

“That's it!” She shouted in outrage and lounge for the blonde but was halted as two red kagune wrap around her wrist and held her still. Knowing who's it belong to she turn around a shot a death glare towards Kaneki, his guilt and overprotectiveness be damn. She is getting her brother in bed and no one is going to stop her.

“Woah imoto mad.”

“Hide.”

“Yes Kaneki?

“Shut up and don’t provoke her, cause next time I’ll just allow her to drag your ass back to bed” 

“So mean Neki”

Slowly allowing the appendages to release the girl and slither back into his back, Kaneki walk towards his boyfriend and sweep him up bridal style making Hide release a squeal as he wasn’t prepared for that to happen. Finally processing what was happening he struggle and kick and whinned about not wanting to go back to bed and having to sleeping more. Realizing that Kaneki wasn’t going to listen to him or put him down he resigned to his fate. Once they were in the room and kaneki tuck him in and wash prepare to leave with his bang cover his head, he tug on his shirt halting his moment and said in a small voice but sounded as if he was screaming them once it reach his ears. 

“It not your fault I forgive you. There no need to beat yourself over something that you couldn’t control this was your first time ever having to deal with ghoul mating. You had no guidance and you didn’t know that what you did could happen. I’ve read that some ghouls get lost in there pleasure that they lose control over their very mind and submit to their desires. You stop before you can do anymore damage Neki, so don’t beat yourself up over it, okay?”

Not reply or showing any signs of acknowledgement that he may or may not be paying attention he shrugged off Hide grip on his shirt and kept on walking. Once he made it to the door he steal a glance behind him and before opening the door and walking out, leaving Hide once again alone in his room.


	5. Boyfriends who are way too stubborn

It wasn’t until five hours later that Kaneki appear once again and sat down on Hide’s bed. Staring down at the small frame that was beneath the covers, and reaching out he gently stroke the blonde’s hair. After a few seconds Hide began to stir and Kaneki stopped his administration. He watch as Hide slowly open his eyes and look up at him with blurriness from just waking up. He could only look on as the blonde slowly but surely became more aware of who was looking at him and his surroundings. In silence Kaneki continue to look at him and didn’t so much as flinch when Hide reach out towards him and place his hand upon Kaneki’s cheek. It was only after a few seconds that Hide slowly started to let his fingers drop, that Kaneki reach out and held Hide’s hand in place. It during this moment of silence that they allowed themselves to be lost in their own world, however it was broken once Kaneki turn his head and look the other way. Sighing to himself quietly, Hide quickly put on a smile that would leave others breathless by the sheer beauty and radiance of it. Letting his other hand go up to Kaneki's other cheek he held his head in both of his hands and gently turned his head towards his direction. Allowing his boyfriend to do what he wanted, Kaneki just stare at his lover. And was caught off guard by the expression that Hide had on. It was time like these that Kaneki wonder how he had ever manage to catch the beautiful blonde and claim him as his own. Hell Hide even accepted him as he was and yet all he did in return was repeatedly either hurt or push him away or even ignore him for a certain period of time. It just wasn’t right. Damn it all.

With the hand that was still placed upon Hide’s hand, Kaneki subconsciously gripped the human smaller and frailer hand in his much larger and stronger hand in a tight and painful vice like grip that caused Hide to wince and whimper in pain. Immediately releasing Hide’s hand after he saw, heard and felt the blonde display of pain. Kaneki got up and mumble a quick apology before turning around to leave once more. As he felt that it would be better if he just left and stay away where he couldn’t hurt his beloved anymore.

“Wait Kaneki!” Called out Hide.

Coming to a halt where he was halfway to the door, Kaneki turns towards the bleach hair blonde and came into eye to eye contact with him. Turning his head away and breaking the contact once again, he waited for whatever Hide had to say. 

He knew that his behavior was unacceptable and that he was acting more of a cold-hearted bastard. Hell he didn’t even apologize yet for what he did to frail bedridden man in front of him, but he knew that this behavior of his might just be able to help him push the frail blonde away. What he didn’t know was that the said blonde can see right through him. Hide knew Kaneki way too well and automatically knew what he was trying to do.

“You know Kaneki, you have to do better than that if you think I’m going to stay away from you. That act you're doing isn’t working on me. I’m not going to leave or blame you for something you couldn’t control."

Hearing the bed creak and footsteps coming his way, Kaneki knew that the small blonde once again got out of bed and was heading his way. It wasn’t long till he felt thin arms come around his middle and another body that much smaller and scrawny in comparison to his larger and much more muscular built press to the front of his body. Hesitating for a second Kaneki lifted both of his arms and encircle the frail blonde in a gentle hug.

“Kaneki please don’t blame yourself for this mess. Ghoul mating is a very difficult thing. It's not like I wasn’t prepare for the consequences. Even with this little one growing inside me.”

Once Hide had finish that sentence Kaneki’s eyes widen in shock and he finally turn his head and stare down at the smaller man before him. 

“You and Nishiki were pretty loud when I was unconscious ya know. I can still hear a conversation even in my unconscious state, Neki.”

Finally after what seem so long Kanek finally found his voice, bowing his head and bringing it to Hide’s forehead so that both of their heads were touching he said.

“Sorry, I’m sorry for everythin-” Cutting Kaneki off during mid-sentence Hide reply with his own responds. “Stop apologizing already Kanek, I understand and I know.”

“You're too good for me.” The half ghoul said with a sad smile upon his face. His face ridden with guilt and eyes that show just how torn he was about everything.

“And you're too stubborn.” The blonde retaliated back.

“Have I’ve ever told you that you are my most important person and it's because of you I can keep on moving, to live, to fight, to protect, even if I was to become the very thing that I try to avoid. To become a monster and give into my ghoul side, my demon. It is because of you that I can still keep my humanity,my sanity, my sense of normalcy, my heart and ability to feel compassion and love. Of course I love everyone at Anteiku but not quite how I love you, I’ll be lost without you. If something was to ever happen to you. I’m afraid there will be nothing stopping me from losing my sanity or even following you in death.”

It was in that moment that the human now knew just how important he was to the half-ghoul. He knew that he at least may of had some importance to his lover, but he never thought that he meant that much. And with tears streaming down his face, he pressed his body closer to Kaneki’s and tighten his grip around the ghoul body. Sobs wrecked the blonde’s frame as he brought his head in the junction of where Kaneki’s shoulder and neck met. Suddenly he felt a finger under his chin and could do nothing but allowed the man before him to lift up his face to his and kissed him as if his life depended on it.

The kiss itself was passionate and a bit rough, but after a while it turned innocent, sweet and soft. It wasn't until they heard a small gasp that they separated and turn towards to the door and saw Hinami with her hands clasp upon her mouth, looking embarrass at getting caught along with everyone else that was behind her at the door apparently eavesdropping. Suddenly laughter filled the room and all of the ghouls and Kimi turned their attention to Hide, who was laughing hysterically and it wasn't long before they all joined in on the laughter. After a minutes of laughing they all calmed down and Hide took that time to catch their attention by giving a small cough.

“You guys are ridiculous and I wouldn't change that for the world. I'm glad that you guys became apart of my family. Especially with this little fella that's on the way.” With that said he smiled at them warmly and with pure happiness in his amber/brown eyes. Each and everyone of them smile and they all thought the same.

This is their family and they would gladly fight and protect each other until the end.


End file.
